3 Ways to Empower Moms in Every Stage

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Some of what drives my soul is empowering women. A branch from that is supporting and empowering moms no matter the stage of motherhood that they are in. Motherhood looks different for each of us as there are many stages and groups. We have the moms to be, the new moms, the toddler moms, the stepmoms, the moms that add grand to the title, the homeschool moms, the moms of twins, the moms of teens, the sports moms, the stay at home moms  and so many more out there. 

While we focus on welcoming each other as moms, sometimes we can’t help but gravitate to the moms that we have the most in common with. This does not mean that we have nothing in common with the others. It only means that we are in the same stage of motherhood. 

Below are some mindful notes that I’ve made for myself to empower moms that are not in the same stage as I am.

Engage and Connect with Different Moms

I’ve learned from some of the networking events that I have attended that each mom has a story about their current stage of motherhood and want to talk about it. I make it a point to connect with those moms that are in a different stage than me. For example, at a recent event I met a mom that was in her 50’s or 60’s. I could see in her eyes that she wanted to connect and share her story as the younger moms were doing. Her children no longer live at home. I sat with her and her husband as they shared photos with me of where their son currently resides. It turns out that we had more in common than I thought. We both had visited Asheville, NC and we share the love for breweries in Miami. 

Celebrate Moms in All Stages

Motherhood should be celebrated daily. No matter the stage that we are in, at the end of the day we made it as a mom. If you are starting motherhood and you meet a mom who has their children transitioning to middle school, let’s celebrate her stage as much as you love for another to celebrate how you are doing as a new mom. Same as if you are a mom that has her kids in high school already and you meet a mom-to-be, share that moment under the umbrella of motherhood and give her grace as she’s entering this journey.

Listen and Be Compassionate

Don’t we all struggle as moms? Especially when it comes to disciplining our kids? Let’s stop judging each other on the decisions we make with our children as moms. One morning, a mom that is a member at the all women’s gym I attend, walked in fuming. As she started to let it all out on a vent about the mess her kids made right before school, I stood there for a moment to listen and I thought to myself how I’ve been there many times. She had a tone of frustration because she did not know what to do to discipline them. She also felt some guilt because she had yelled at them. Her eyes started to get teary and at that moment, I hugged her. I didn’t judge her for yelling at them. I did not interrupt her vent by saying one of my stories. This was her stage in motherhood – finding the disciplinary balance. So, I showed her compassion and reassured her that her mom instinct will tell her how to handle this issue.

As I think about these situations, I’m asking myself what stage/group do I find myself? The stage that I’m in of motherhood connects me to the moms of adult children, moms in sports, moms of teens, boy moms, and stepmoms to name a few. But my heart smiles when I connect with other moms in different stages of motherhood. That is when I feel the most gratitude – when we can empower moms. 

Embracing Motherhood: Finding Strength in Stumbles and Learning to Say ‘Soy Yo’

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Me caí, me paré, caminé, me subí

Me fuí contra la corriente y también me perdí

Fracasé, me encontré, lo viví y aprendí

My daughter first introduced this song to me a few years ago after 

a teacher shared it with her high school Spanish class.

The catchy beat stuck, but the words stuck even more!

Cuando te pegas fuerte más profundo es el beat, sí

Sigo bailando y escribiendo mis letra’

Sigo cantando con la’ puerta’ abierta’

Atravesando por todas estas tierras

Y no hay que viajar tanto pa’ encontrar la respuesta

Y no te preocupes si no te aprueban

Cuando te critiquen tú solo di:

¡Soy yo!

~Bomba Estéreo

The translation:

I fell, I stopped, I walked, I got up

I went against the current and I also got lost

I failed, I found myself, I lived it and I learned from it

The harder you hit yourself the deeper is the beat, yes

I keep dancing and writing my lyrics

I keep singing with the doors open

Crossing all these lands

And you don’t have to travel so much to find the answer

And don’t worry if they don’t approve of you

When they criticize you, just say:

It’s me

I don’t know why I like this song so much.

Maybe it’s the confidence of the girl portrayed in the video

that I wish I emulated at her age. Maybe it’s that when I look

at the lyrics through my mommy lens, something about 

the words incapsulate the messiness and complexities of my motherhood journey.

The words authentically and vulnerably make my heart say, Yes!

Me caí, me paré, caminé, me subí

I’ve stumbled along the way. Some days feeling defeated and not at all like I was being the best mom. Sometimes the pressure and expectations that came with mothering knocked me flat on my face, but I always got up. Amiga, remember you get do-overs. Remember after each gloomy day, there will be sunnier days. When you fall, be kind to yourself. Be patient. Take what you need, and then stand back up.

Fracasé, me encontré, lo viví y aprendí

There is a long list of mommy fails and missteps I’ve had along the way, but I can’t dwell on it. I have learned and kept moving. Motherhood will challenge you to be introspective and honest with yourself. It’s not easy work, but good work. Amiga, you will get some things wrong, we all do. The question is, Will you learn from it? I have learned valuable lessons on my limitations, my humanity, how to ask for help, saying no, letting go, and so many more things.

Y no te preocupes si no te aprueban

Cuando te critiquen tú solo di:

¡Soy yo!

And this part! Your motherhood journey is your story, one-of-a-kind, unique to you! Amiga, don’t worry about what other moms are doing or saying. Discern and sift through it all, so that you do what is best for you and your family. Don’t seek the approval of others.

There is freedom to say…

I want to breastfeed; I don’t want to breastfeed.

I want to homeschool; I don’t want to homeschool.

My kids will go to public school; my kids will go to private school.

I will shop organic; I will shop economically.

I will stay home; I will work.

Do you, amiga! Say, ¡Soy yo!

Enhancing Childhood Development: The Power of Reading Aloud and Audiobooks

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The Power of Reading Aloud and Audiobooks

The best parts of my childhood revolve around books. Whether they were picture books or chapter books, those pages created magical worlds. My imagination would run wild and I found myself daydreaming of the places that I read about. Little did I know that I was dreaming and learning at the same time.

Did you know that embracing our imagination through reading — through both reading aloud and audiobooks — is key to a lifetime of learning. Whether they’re only beginning to grasp language or a middle-schooler diving into more complex stories, our willingness to read to our children is a priceless gift. It’s a practice that not only fosters a love for stories but also lays the foundation for a lifetime of learning.

A Gateway to Worlds Unseen

When we read aloud to our younger children, we’re not simply sharing stories; we’re opening doors to new vocabularies and concepts. Picture books become gateways to dreamy realms, where dragons roam and heroes rise. But the benefits extend far beyond entertainment. Through reading aloud children absorb the rhythms and cadences of language. They’re then able to refine their own speaking skills in the process.

For older or independent readers, the magic of reading aloud still exists. It offers an opportunity for shared exploration. Parents and children can discuss complex themes and characters. Reading with a parent even allows them to have access to stories that may beyond their current reading level or preferred genres.

Bridging the Word Gap through Reading Aloud and Audiobooks

Aside from exploring new worlds, reading also helps children access new words. Accessing these new words “bridges the word gap.” What is the word gap? By 3 years of age, there is a significant difference in exposure to new words between children from the wealthiest and poorest families.

More research shows that children exposed to fewer words face significant disadvantages in school readiness and long-term educational outcomes.

Empowering Struggling Learners

For reluctant readers or those struggling with language barriers, audiobooks can empower them in encouraging ways. They allow them to engage with content beyond their reading level while fostering a love for reading. Audiobooks provide struggling readers with an immersive experience, enhancing comprehension and leading to appreciation of written text. Audiobooks can also boost confidence, improve fluency, and instill a sense of accomplishment in them.

Including Average and High-Level Readers Through Reading Aloud and Audiobooks

But audiobooks aren’t just for struggling readers; they cater to the diverse learning styles of all students. Average to high achievers can use audiobooks to explore more challenging texts, try new genres, or refine their fluency. With both reading aloud and audiobooks, these readers can explore more variety or challenges on their own terms.

Do you remember the first time you were read aloud? Or what about when a teacher read aloud a book that you loved in class? Maybe you’ve never experienced the magic of hearing a story told to you (for that I am so sorry because you deserved that experience). No matter where you fall in that spectrum, you can begin a new journey of reading with your children and family. In just a few minutes every day, you can expand their horizons and begin setting them up for success. 

Or, maybe, you’re struggling with your own reading fluency or just struggle with time. By using audiobooks for your reading sessions, you can contribute to your child’s development with a few clicks of an app. 

So, pick up a book, hit play on an audiobook, and embark on a journey of imagination with your child today. The benefits of reading aloud and audiobooks will last a lifetime.

Looking into how to begin using audiobooks for your family’s reading journey?

StoryKasa is a free audio storytelling platform that provides families, schools, and communities an easy way to create and listen to stories from around the world and in multiple languages. Discover the magic of storytelling through StoryKasa’s library of audio stories by clicking here

While this post is part of a series that has been sponsored by StoryKasa, all opinions, thoughts and research is shared in truth by the Latina Mom Collective Editorial Board.

3 Latina Authors to Search for at the Library

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Stack of books with flowers in vase on top | 3 Latina Authors

Throughout publishing history, Latina writers continue to be underrepresented, resulting in a lack of our narratives. Yet, over the years, strides have been made towards the inclusion of our voices in literature, courtesy of trailblazing Latina authors who shattered barriers, weathered microaggressions, and racism, and filled a void. Here are a few of our favorite Latina authors to celebrate and search for on your next library visit.

Sandra Cisneros

The first Latina author (specifically Mexican-American) that I was introduced to (and ignited my passion for writing) is Sandra Cisneros. When I was a freshman in high school, I read her best-selling and critically acclaimed novel The House On Mango Street (1983) which follows a young Mexican American girl growing up in Chicago which sold millions of copies. That book forever changed my life. For the first time I was able to recognize familiar characters and themes in a book.

Julia Alvarez

Julia Alvarez left the Dominican Republic for the United States in 1960 at the age of ten (although she was born in the United States). Over the course of her life she has written six novels, three books of nonfiction, three collections of poetry, and eleven books for children and young adults. In college, I was introduced to In the Time of the Butterflies (1994) and my eyes opened to the plight of other Latinos in their countries. Her other well-known novel How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents (1991) was the first novel by a Dominican-American woman to be critically acclaimed in the United States.

Laura Esquivel

In her debut novel, Like Water for Chocolate (1995), Laura Esquivel creates both a novel and cookbook that explores the tale of a family during the turn of the century in Mexico. This book was later adapted into an award-winning film and helped increase visibility of Mexican literature throughout mainstream media. She has since written 10 novels, many of which have explored Mexico’s complex history and race relations.

Latina Mom Collective sometimes links to affiliate links when we share purchases we love and recommend. This means if you click on a product we suggest, like these Latina author’s book, and you purchase from that link, we may make a small commission at no additional cost to you. Every product we share is something we genuinely love, recommend, and have in our own homes!

Gardening and Caring for My Mental Health

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The older I become, the more I enter my wandering around the garden señora era. My favorite place in my city is the botanical garden. I could spend hours there. Sadly responsibilities take priority most days, so I settle on my own garden for my fix. One day I’ll have a cottage garden, but for now I dig in pots and small garden beds on my porch and backyard.

As someone who lives with anxiety and depression, the peace that I find when gardening is magical. There’s something about caring for these delicate plants that helps me release the negative energy that sometimes suffocates me. Caring for these delicate roots are a reminder that with water, sunshine and patience I can grow past my own mental illnesses. 

With the lightest touches and slightest snips, I can see my plant grow and feel my body releasing the tension from the base of my neck to my shoulders. I need to shift my focus towards my hands and pruners as I hold delicate leaves. It leads me away from intrusive thoughts and calms my racing mind. It steadies my hands so I don’t make unnecessary cuts or damage. It teaches me that growth doesn’t lead to a perfect bloom.

There is no need to chase perfection when working with plants because you have very little control over humidity or sunshine. You learn to accept that you try your best and that beauty can still come to life – even if it’s not what you expected. Sometimes surviving is a win and whatever happens after that can lead to even more growth.

When watching a plant grow, you don’t see it grow. You begin to understand what looks like healthy growth or what looks like disease, but you don’t see it grow moment by moment. Like with mental illness, you know it’s always there, but you don’t always feel it. Some days you’re at peace and content, but other days leave you feeling tired and sore even though all you’ve done is sleep. During those long days, it’s important to have something to channel your energy (even if there’s very little of it left) into something else other than the thoughts that rob you of your joy. It’s important to remind yourself that growth is still possible even if you can’t see it.

As important as counseling and therapy sessions are, gardening can help those tools for those of us struggling with mental health. Whether you have a sprawling backyard or a small balcony, there’s always room to cultivate a little piece of paradise. So, grab your trowel, put on your gardening gloves, and let nature be your guide on the journey to blooming through any mental health struggles that you face. Happy gardening, amigas.

Empowering Our Children: A Latina Mom’s Guide to Teaching Self-Regulation

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Empowering Our Children: A Latina Mom's Guide to Teaching Our Children Self-Regulation | Photo of Child Sitting Alone

There are a few areas in parenting where, I think, I’ve done a pretty good job. One of those areas is teaching our children to self-regulate – even if we’re still on the beginners level. As a Latina, I know how previous generations have sometimes told us that “children should be seen and not heard,” but I want my children to be seen and heard as they deserve to have that respect. I also want them to be able to communicate their feelings and control those feelings. While I’m not a professional, I do think that I’ve learned quite a bit about helping my children learn how to self-regulate their emotions through my own experiences with therapy and of course the sometimes beyond useful internet. Here are a few strategies that we use in our home to help develop self-regulation skills.

Encouraging Emotional Awareness

The first step I take in teaching self-regulation is helping my children name their emotions. Once we can differentiate what emotions lead us to think and feel, it becomes easier to work through those feelings. 

For example, I was called a “mean mommy” for not giving one of my children a treat because they failed to complete a particular task after three warnings. I allowed her to call me “mean” because I know she was acting out of frustration for not receiving something. Once that moment passed, I sat with her and shared how I know she wasn’t telling me something to hurt me, but that she was feeling a certain way about her own actions and what that cause. We then looked at our mood book and realized that she was feeling sleepy/tired, so we worked through that and how to share that with me so I understand that she needs a break to rest. 

Using Coping Techniques for Big Emotions

Once my children can identify their emotions (or work with me to name those emotions), it’s time to teach them coping strategies to regulate their feelings. A few of our favorites include breathing exercises and muscle relaxation. Between deep breaths and using our calm down box (a small bin of fidget toys), we can usually slow down our minds enough to have our bodies slow down, too. 

For example, when we are beyond the early stages of intense emotions, I pull out “balloons.” These are imaginary balloons, but we all take a balloon and stretch it and then take deep breaths to blow it up. Sometimes not everyone wants to participate in  blowing it up, but it does cause everyone to become distracted enough that we can start bringing the energy down. Once we have the energy lowered, we work through more techniques to not stifle our emotions but problem-solve or settle them in healthy ways. 

Do as I Say AND as I Do

By far the hardest part of teaching self-regulation has been learning how to control my own emotions. We are our children’s first teachers, so they will learn by seeing how we react. I have already been told a handful of times that if it’s “okay” for me to act a certain way why isn’t it okay for them. I have no excuse, so I admit my mistakes and I even share what I should have differently done. By admitting that I’m still learning, I can show them that they don’t need to strive for perfection when it comes to self-regulation.

Teaching our children to self-regulate their emotions is a valuable investment in who they’ll become one day. Remember to be patient, consistent, and compassionate – with both yourself and them – while you celebrate each step forward.

Seeking Professional Help: In some cases, children may struggle with self-regulation due to underlying issues such as anxiety, ADHD, or trauma. If you notice persistent challenges despite everything you’re doing, consider seeking guidance from a pediatrician, therapist, or school counselor. These professionals can offer personalized strategies and support to help your child overcome obstacles and thrive.

Adding Culture To Our Home Through Decor and More

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Home is more than a space where we sleep and store our belongings; it’s a reflection of who we are, our values, beliefs, and culture. Intertwining our Latino culture into our home through decor, artwork, and other items is my favorite way to celebrate diversity and create a space that feels personal and meaningful for my family. As much as I love our culture (Mexican and Bolivian to be exact), I do still want our home to have a certain aesthetic and vibe. Over the last few years, I’ve leaned more into minimalism and neutral colors and that doesn’t also mesh well with the vibrant pieces of decor I find from our cultures. Yet, I’ve found a few ways to add culture to our home decor aesthetic with pieces that remind us of where we come from and our family history, including in our kitchen.

Choosing Meaningful Pieces

From items that we have found while traveling to items that have been given to us, we have pieces throughout our home that can spark conversations and personalize our space. I love adding specific pieces that have been handed down to us because the nostalgia is genuine and brings us closer to the family members that we no longer have in our lives or whom we don’t get to see as often as we’d like to visit.

I’ll be honest, while we do have a few items throughout our home, we do have some in our storage area. While we’re grateful for everything that we receive and have collected over the years, I’ve learned that having a peaceful home filled with pieces that mean something to me are important than placing items on every surface.

Creating Cultural Corners

One of my favorite spots in my house is my coffee bar area. From this spot, I often watch my daughter play in the backyard or in their playroom which is right next to the coffee bar. In this area, I also have a few items that bring me closer to my culture. There’s an original piece of art, a Mexican clay vase and a plantita hanging from the ceiling. There are also a few Mexican mugs for our coffee. These simple touches in one part of my home definitely make my home not only feel cozier, but also bring a bit of my Mexican culture into our space without overwhelming everything else.

A few other areas like this in our home are actually even more simple, we have a gallery wall with black and white photos of family members from Bolivia intertwined with our current family photos. There are a few mementos and candles that are reminiscent of the lands of our ancestors in my office. My girls have a shelf dedicated to only multicultural and bilingual books that allow them to explore stories on their own.

From Sight to Taste

There is no way to talk about our Latino culture without mentioning the delicious food that comes from our home countries (or the countries of our families). I may not be the best cook out there, but when I find a recipe I am dedicated to making it taste as authentic as possible. Whether that’s making Mexican paletas during the summer or pozole on cold winter days, I’m doing my best to introduce my daughters to the ingredients that come from Mexico or Bolivia. Once the cooking aromas take over the house, there’s no denying that we’ve brought a bit of our culture home.

Whether it’s through gifts we’ve received from our family in other countries or bringing recipes into our kitchen, we’ve been able to add a bit of our culture to our every day lives in simple ways. Are there ways that you bring a bit of your family’s history into your home? We’d love to hear your ideas over on Instagram or Facebook if you’d like to share how you’re sharing your culture in your own homes.

A Millennial Latina Mom’s [Honest] Review of Disney’s Encanto

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When Disney first announced their latest feature film, Encanto, I knew I wanted to see it would be a must-see for our family. I’m a Latina mom who holds on tight to my family’s roots and I adore Disney. I would never expect that this movie that intertwined our language and culture with dynamic and colorful characters would capture my heart (and my daughters’ hearts) as much as it did. Here is one Latina mom’s honest review of Disney’s Encanto.

Representation Matters

The fact that the characters were all of varying skin tones with their unique  hair types shows that Disney genuinely took a look at the makeup of Latino families. Latino families can oftentimes trace their roots back to African heritage, as much as to Spanish colonialism. 

Within one of the Madrigal children’s famlies, there are mixes of Afro-Latinos and lighter-skinned Latinos and that is how so many of our Latinx families look today.

Protect the Familia

Nearly 1/3 of of Latino homes are multigenerational. While all cultures emphasize family, Latinos are unique in that they make up less than 5 percent of those in nursing homes. When it comes to our families, we do anything and everything we can for them. Our first friends are our cousins and holidays are spent with distant relatives and even those lifelong friends that we call “familia”.  Disney’s Encanto captures this beautifully as three generations live in one home.

Strong Female Leads

As a mom of two girls, I want to be sure to teach them that they can save themselves when it comes to problems. While it’s okay to seek help from others, it’s still important to be capable. This can be seen in three characters: Abuela, Maribel and even Isabela. Abuela had to raise her three children alone – a feat reminiscent of my own Abuela once my grandfather was no longer around. Maribel takes it upon herself to save her family’s magic – albeit with some help of a male family member – without waiting for others to push her towards it. Luisa, the oldest of Mirabel’s sisters even takes it literal as she is the physically strongest one in the family. Isabela – I won’t spoil this too much – also learns some lessons along the way.

Overall, Disney’s Encanto is hands down one of the most visually stunning films we have ever seen and their soundtrack is still our go-to for road trips or quick rides.

10 Must-Read Latino Children’s Books

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One of the best ways to celebrate a particular culture is through the words and imagery that those within that community create – like the following must-read Latino children’s books. We have gathered up these inspiring and vibrant books with a wide range of voices to celebrate Latinos and Latinas. There’s something great for every young reader amongst these fiction and nonfiction reads.

Latino Children's Book | Mother of Sharks

During a visit to the beach as a girl, Meli meets a crab who whisks her away on a fantastical adventure. This experience encourages Meli to study sharks and other misunderstood creatures.

Blending the autobiographical with the fantastical, Melissa Cristina Márquez shares her story not only to dispel myths about misunderstood creatures but also to pave the way for Latinas in STEM.

Alma Sofia Esperanza José Pura Candela – try fitting that on a single line when you’re first learning how to write your name. When Alma asks her father why she has so many names.

As she hears the story of her name, Alma starts to think it might be a perfect fit after all—and realizes that she will one day have her own story to tell.

Latino Children's Book | Alma and How She Got Her Name
Latino Children's Book | Mango, Abuela and Me

Mia is thrilled when her grandmother (Abuela), who has always lived far away, comes to stay with Mia and her family. Abuela doesn’t speak English, but over time they teach one another their languages and form a close bond.

This cross-generational story is ideal for families navigating their own language journeys.

Originally from the Dominican Republic, Lola’s family celebrates their culture every day through food, music, and stories. But Lola doesn’t understand why they had to leave, or what it means that she can’t remember her birthplace.

As her family and friends begin to share their memories of their island, Lola comes to understand the truth of her abuela’s words: “Just because you don’t remember a place doesn’t mean it’s not in you.

Latino Children's Book | Islandborn
Latino Children's Book | Paletero Man

Written by Latin Grammy-winning musician Lucky Diaz, join a young boy through the streets of his neighborhood as he runs to catch up the Paletero Man.

With English and Spanish text side-by-side, this bilingual book brings the colorful flavors of one neighborhood to life.

When Areli was just a baby, her mama and papa moved from Mexico to New York with her brother, Alex, to make a better life for the family–and when she was in kindergarten, they sent for her, too.

Written by a DACA Dreamer, Areli Morales tells her own powerful and vibrant immigration story in this children’s book.

Areli is a Dreamer
Latino Children's Book | Carmela Full of Wishes

When Carmela wakes up on her birthday, she’s excited to finally be old enough to run the family errands with her big brother. And when she finds a dandelion right outside the laundromat, her brother reminds her she’ll have to make a wish before blowing it out. But how will she decide what to wish for?

Spend a day in the life of a young boy in Puerto Rico as he ventures into San Juan to look for his Papi.

Happy piragüeros, mischievous cats, and colorful musicians color this tale of love, family, and the true meaning of home in this Latino children’s book.

Across the Bay

Everyone has to start somewhere, and Selena began her singing career at quinceañeras and other small venues. As her popularity grew, so did the platforms — until she could fill entire stadiums with adoring fans.

Ana loves stories so much that she often makes them up to help her little brother fall asleep. But in her small village there are only a few books and she has read them all. One morning, Ana wakes up to a traveling library resting on the backs of two burros.

This book is inspired by efforts of real-life librarian Luis Soriano.

Latina Mom Collective sometimes links to affiliate links when we share purchases we love and recommend. This means if you click on a product we suggest, like these Latino children’s books, and you purchase from that link, we may make a small commission at no additional cost to you. Every product we share is something we genuinely love, recommend, and have in our own homes!

When Pregnancy Loss Steals Your Joy

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A few months ago, I was just beginning my monthly facial when my esthetician and I started talking about children. As we compared ages and favorite moments, the conversation shifted to babies. She mentioned that her daughter was ready to be a sister and almost had the chance the previous year. I listened as she told me that she was just past 20 weeks when she lost the baby. I listened as she told me that it’s been almost a year. I listened as she apologized for bringing it up. I listened as the silence began to fill the room as we remembered her precious baby. 

As we went through that appointment, we kept sharing about our children – the ones who grace us with their laughter and precious heartbeats and the ones who were taken from us far too soon. Every now and then the sadness would fill the air, but with each sentence or breath, I felt a bit lighter. I like to think that she did, too.

For many of us, the pregnancy loss moms, when you’ve lost a baby there’s an overwhelming sadness and grief that rushes to fill the spot in your body that has been left barren. There are questions and doubts that float through your mind on whether you did something wrong or are being punished. So when we can openly share about the babies that we lost far too soon with someone who understands the emotions and realities that accompany pregnancy and infant losses, we want to sit with them a bit longer. We want to let the tears fall and we want to say their name or even just “baby” aloud without feeling judged or as if our words will make anyone else feel uncomfortable. We also want to release what we’ve been holding in so that we can tuck it back into that little pocket in our hearts where the most bittersweet what-if and what-could-have-beens live until the next time that we can talk about those babies without hesitation.

But how do we reach that point? With my own losses, I’ve managed to work through my own grief in three ways. As always, please speak with a licensed healthcare professional should you find yourself struggling mentally with any kind of loss.

Accept the Stages of Pregnancy Loss Grief

The five stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. You may find yourself in some stages longer than others, but allow yourself to go through them. They are necessary for healing after a pregnancy loss.

Search for Hope After a Pregnancy Loss

Do you find hope in the fact that the sun always finds a way to show up the next morning? Or do you find it in conversations with others who have had similar struggles and are now experiencing new happiness? Wherever you think hope may be, please search for it and hold on to it. 

I find my hope in Jesus Christ. If it were not for the promise of a better eternity I would not be standing here.

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; grief, crying, and pain will be no more, because the previous things have passed away.” (Revelation 21:4 CSB)

Catch Your Breath After Loss

I promise, it sounds so simple, but breathe. Allow your lungs to fill with oxygen and breath. Take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that while your heart is still beating there is still life and as long as there is life there is a future. Your life has a purpose and I know you can find it. 

I know what you’re thinking, “ It is not that easy. I cannot just pick up the pieces and move on after my pregnancy loss. It’s not going to happen.” I’ve been there, I promise. I have locked myself in the bathroom stall at work ugly crying and then forced myself to go back to my desk with a red snotty nose. I have yelled at my husband that he just didn’t get it and that he didn’t care about our babies because he was okay now. I have looked at pregnant women with a fit of jealousy that I’m sure turned my eyes an ugly seaweed green. I have been there and you’re right when you say that it’s not easy.

Losing a child isn’t easy.

Losing hope isn’t easy.

But, I promise that this is just a moment in time. A moment that you’ll remember for a lifetime, but don’t miss out on other moments that could alleviate some of your pain. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it. I promise.

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World Blood Donor Day

How a Blood Transfusion Saved Me: A Mother’s Gratitude on World Blood Donor Day

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As I sit to write down these words in honor of World Blood Donor Day, I can't help but shed tears as I think...

The Power of Storytelling: Bridging Generations with StoryKasa

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On a recent flight without my daughters, I found myself looking through videos and nudging my husband to watch along with me. "She sounds like...

Mom’s [Mental] Summer Prep List

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The school year is ending. I’m going to be honest, that’s a lot of work for me as a working mom, but even just...

The Power of Family Stories: Strengthening Bonds and Building Literacy

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“Is that an old song, mama?” My little one asked me one day as I sang her to sleep. “Yes, Tata taught it...